My brother and I have been through a lot together and these adults lives we have experienced the last few years have resulted in our being pretty close. But sometimes...he stuns me. And I have to say things like, "Geez, J. You disgust me." When you're a big sister, you can get away with that. And maybe he'll listen. Maybe not.
First we had the obligatory: "How are the kids?" "Good I have them this week. How goes the divorce?" "Slowly. But the offer is finally out." "The one we talked about six weeks ago?" "Yeah. That one." "Ugh." "Agreed. Ugh."
Then the topic turned to his dating life.
He ended a fairly long (18-20 month) relationship late this winter. They hung on longer than they should have. I felt sad because I really liked her. I also knew before he admitted it that it needed to end.
So I asked about life post-relationship. He informed me he's had six or eight first dates since then. Inside my head I'm thinking, "Holy hell, boy! Move fast, much?" But then he said he's on-line dating. Ah. That explains the ability to find someone to date.
This is a South Dakota house; the state where J lives.
He started talking about these women. This one was a bad communicator, "and I told her that." Another one lived in a community he doesn't like and is apparently tied to that community, "so I nipped that in the bud." He was so clinical in his discussion. It was like he was buying furniture. I was surprised at my reaction, but it was ticking me off. Maybe because I shared some of my more romantically prone thoughts on the topic and he made sarcastic comments like, "Oh yeah. THAT'S practical." Eventually he just plain pissed me off. He said something about still being able to catch the 30 year-olds because "most of these women who are 40 just look too old."
Gentlemen, if you have a getting-divorced 40-something sister. Don't say this to her.
Like I said...he pissed me off.
I pointed out to him that I...his 45 year-old sister...have less wrinkles than he does.
He chuckled and agreed.
I seethed.
I think this is when I told him he disgusted me.
Like he's some great catch. Ugh. I love him but he's got his warts. Damn hairy warts.
"The gene pool up here is pretty darn shallow," he offered in some ugly peace flag. I did manage to get off the retort, "Yeah. I'm familiar with shallow." I was proud of coming up with that verbal jab on the spur of the moment. He missed the point. My rather sharp, barbed point. Or maybe he was just smart enough to shut-up.
That's about the point I couldn't get off the phone fast enough.
And this folks, is why I hope to never have to resort to something like Match.com...shallow assholes, like my brother.
